One more Day Mom

It will be 15 years tomorrow that you passed, if this were our last 24 hours and we knew you would meet Jesus tomorrow what would I do differently, I would tell you I love you more, I would never let hospice take you to the hospital, I tried mom but no one would listen when I told them you wanted to die at home where Dad did, I was out numbered and I couldn't fulfill my promise to hold your hand until you were gone, Mom, I fell asleep for a couple of hours just as you were passing over, I've wondered why God would make me so sleepy at the moment you needed me, I was holding your hand most of the night and the smell of death came on my hands, when I ask the hospice nurse what that chemical was and she said death for some reason I couldn't hold my eyes open, Mom Marce laid in the bed with you holding you, you seem to be in so much pain, Bon and her told me to lay down a miniute and then they woke me and said you had to go to the hospital, I threw a fit but they took you and when I got to the hospital you were already gone, Poor little Marce rode in the ambulance with you and me and Bon followed, you had passed on the way to the hospital, I would remember with you all our wonderful times and how much they meant to me, I would tell you how beautiful you are even if you didn't think so, I would apologize for ever worrying you, I would cook for you even if you couldn't eat, I remember the day before Dad passed he wanted one of my Grilled Cheese sandwich and to this day think of him every time I eat one. Mom I MISS you so much I can hardly wait until the Lord comes for me then I'll be with you and dad and all the loved ones in Heaven, I completed our Jackson side of the family tree and you would have loved seeing it, even pictures of some long ago relatives, Mom I tried to buy your home place (To keep it in the Family) but once again it sold before anyone took me serious, Marce and Bon thought I was nuts for wanting it, but from memory, and your wonderful childhood stories, I felt so at home there, tell Grandma I am in the middle of tracing her daddys land, and tell her I will never let the cemetary grow up, it is almost or may even be full by now, Aunt Net passed, I visited her and Grandpa in the rain, I wish we could have spent more time in the holler, you survived on love and mom you wouldn't believe what a big funeral you had, A sweet Black lady you use to work with came to the house just to tell us how much you taught her and credited you for her nursing career, OH IF WE HAD JUST ONE MORE DAY